Welcome, dear readers, to our regular letter column; a series of missives from and to the internet, delivered by a series of tubes. We welcome your comments and questions. About anything! We’ll answer it, and at least one of us will take you seriously. Maybe.

Seriously, ask us anything! You can ask us about comics. After all, it’s in the site’s name, so we should do a little lip service to them now and again instead of focusing solely on Gravity Falls and Cougar Town. I’m not happy about it either, but there you go. On the plus side, you don’t HAVE to ask about comics! You know Gravity Falls and Cougar Town? We love talking about those, too! And movies, music, wrestling and food! Well, Brandon’s expertise is more along the side of comics, but hey, putting him out is just a happy perk to all of this anyway, so you’d basically be killing two birds with one stone.

You’re welcome, internet.

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Jay (@jayrunham) asks: What do you think the chances of usseeing Wasp in the new Ant-Man movie are?

James: Man, I don’t even know. All there is to go on regarding the movie right now is two casting announcements and a few sentences Edgar Wright gave in an interview almost eight years ago that appears to have been relatively accurate - he said Hank Pym and Scott Lang would likely appear in the movie teaming up if he could work it. Beyond that, it’s all pure speculation, so let’s just call the chances “certainly possible and hella tempting” and leave it at that?

Because here’s the thing, and it’s something that was mentioned earlier today at ComicsAlliance in a piece by Andrew Wheeler. I don’t necessarily agree with the deep skepticism of Wheeler, but I think he’s on point when he says that, with a movie about a younger Scott Lang (since Paul Rudd is ageless) and an older Hank Pym, it’s harder to successfully introduce Janet Van Dyne. Do you have her be older? In that case, one of Marvel’s iconic superheroes might not get to do some superhero-ing, flashbacks aside. Do you keep her young? If you do, you should probably resist the urge to make her Scott’s love interest, because that makes her interchangeable in a somewhat uncomfortable way. And if you omit her altogether, you’re removing, even if it’s only temporarily, one of Marvel’s iconic female heroes from your movie universe. I’m definitely excited for the movie, but the question of whether and how to handle Janet Van Dyne without completely changing her origin is a difficult one to tackle. I suppose you could make her more like a different incarnation a la Red Wasp from the Ultimate Universe, but who even knows. Hopefully, Marvel can resolve this satisfactorily!

Brandon: James and Jay? I’m about to rock your god damn worlds.

As with all things, the answer lies in the amazing work of Jeff Parker. Before he was a relatively bigger name in the comic book industry, Marvel had him writing quite a few of their Marvel Adventures books - a line of all ages comics built to contain fun done-in-one stories for… well, everyone. Anyway, in his Avengers series, Jeff Parker had a weird line-up of characters, including Captain America, Iron Man, Hulk, Wolverine, Storm, Spider-Man, and Giant Girl. In this reality, the young Janet Van Dyne was given powers by Hank Pym, a scientist in her father’s employ, because she wanted to be a superhero, and Pym had this patent on some particles. It’s something that worked wonderfully in those comics, and something I think would work nicely in the Ant Man movie, especially if Edgar Wright goes with a variation of the Irredeemable Ant-Man route, where an “Ant Man” suit that he’s developing is stolen from him, and he has to track it down. It would jive with the misreported rumors that Hank Pym is the “villain” - or in this case, a foce against our main character, the hapless young man who took the suit for whatever reason. Who is to say that another operative, such as Janet Van Dyne, isn’t also given some Pym particles or a suit to help track this suit down? It could work.

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Jay continues: Which two LEGO Marvel Super Heroes characters are your favourite to put together?

James: I haven’t played the game beyond the demo for the 3DS, so I can’t really say. That said, it is obviously the combination of Spider-Man and Benjamin J Grimm, the Ever-Lovin’, Blue-Eyed Thing, because they’re the two best Marvel characters along with Kitty Pryde, but she’s apparently not in the game.

Brandon: Black Widow and Hawkeye! They’re fun to put together, which is to say, for the most part, Danica and I play the game together, and it’s fun to be Black Widow and Hawkeye.

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Scott (@scottowilliams) asks: What will become of Brodus Clay now that Xavier Woods has usurped the Funkadactyls???

James: Realistically, I feel like the WWE is going to keep pursuing the beef a bit longer, especially as long as Naomi and Cameron are still called the Funkadactyls and Brodus Clay is still wearing fake dinosaur spines on his gear. Worst case scenario, It’s Brodus vs Xavier (and Tensai) in a match to determine who “gets” the Funkadactyls, because the WWE is not always great with gender stuff (see: their entire RAW commentary team). Best case scenario, Brodus loses one final match, goes away for a while, reappears with a non-dancing-fat-guy-comedy character. The middle option is exactly like the best case scenario except Brodus is released.

Brandon: Grist for the wrestling machine, probably. Man, it’s crazy how wrestling entertainment just grinds up dudes.

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Scott continues: Thoughts on the Golden Globes?

James: My stance on the Pre-Oscars has been stated a few times before, but I’m always happy to repeat my correctness: I absolutely love the Golden Globes.

Then again, I also just love awards shows. I know there are people down on them, but those people, several of whom are my friends, have different outlooks from mine, and I guess that’s okay. So here’s why it’s not:

Basically, whenever someone says, “[Award Show X] is bullshit!” what they’re really saying is that their personal picks don’t usually win, or that one of their favourite movies didn’t win once. Maybe they hate Titanic. Or maybe it’s just a really general dislike of trying to rank art in quality. All of that’s fair, mind you, but I’ve found that having a different attitude helps me have a lot of fun watching: I genuinely don’t give a shit about the nominees or winners beyond a cursory “wouldn’t it be nice?” idea. I try to view these events as a celebration of the entire field, so I don’t mind it if something I like isn’t nominated; it just means that the field was so strong that deserving stuff couldn’t quite fit.

Taking away the pressure out of who wins, you’re left with musical performances, host monologues, speeches and great dresses, and that’s all stuff I like. The Golden Globes even take it to the next level, by eschewing the standard decorum of taking place in a concert hall and everyone sits in their comfy seats the whole time. The Globes take place within the context of a full dinner and drink service, and that means everyone’s relaxed and in a good mood. Stars go between tables and crack jokes. They make faces at the camera. They get drunk and give better speeches. It’s a hoot. Seriously, this last sunday, Jacqueline Bisset started getting played off with the polite music during her speech, but she kept going. The show’s producers then switched to the louder, bouncier “go to commercials” music, but she kept going. Eventually, the producers turned down the music and let her finish at her own pace. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen a star play Acceptance Speech Chicken with the Awards Show… and win. It was hilarious. Never change, Golden Globes.

Brandon: The Golden Globes usually ends up being a lot better than most of the others because of it’s atmosphere. What better way to get folks straight goofin’ than having dinner with friends and booze?

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Scott wraps up: Who is your favourite Image Comics founder?

James: In terms of the actual work, it probably has to be Jim Lee. This isn’t to besmirch the other founders, though if we’re being honest, I haven’t read a lot of the actual Image stuff made buy Erik Larsen, Jim Valentino or Marc Silvestri and I’ve never really felt the pull to, either. But the thing about Jim Lee is that no matter how much I may vehemently dislike the direction DC has taken under his stewardship or his costume redesigns, or while I might think a lot of the script for Hush isn’t very good, I still love the actual comics work Lee does. I stuck with Justice League for waaaaay longer than I should have just because I liked seeing him draw those characters. And more than that, he’s improved his craft since having his biggest hit ever with X-Men #1 in the 1990s, and that’s more than you can say for Rob Liefeld.

And I’m not trying to knock Liefeld, either. If I was super young and I sold millions of copies of comics and people told me how great I was and I got to be in a bluejeans commercial, I’d probably stop giving a shit if people thought I could draw feet, too. Weirdly enough, I respect the hell out of that guy for keeping on keeping on, and for being 100% genuine and hyped basically all the time. He’s maybe my favourite Image founder when they’re viewed separate from their work. Because no matter how much I may listen to a Word Balloon episode he’s on and get frustrated that things he’s saying don’t really align with the truth, I don’t think he’s lying; I think he genuinely believes everything he says, and his constant, nonstop enthusiasm is kinda infectious. In a weird way, I actually wish more comics creators were like The Rob, and I’ll see myself out.

Brandon: Easy: Liefeld. But before I get to my stupid, stupid reason for that, I’m gonna march through all these guys.

Todd MacFarlane, I respect, for being an asshole, and not giving a fuck. He is actually a dude who has zero fucks to give, and hands them out in exactly that quantity with consistency. Of the four co-founders who are still with the company, he and Marc Silverstri are the dudes who generally don’t make creator owned comics anymore, just comics created by them, or for them. It goes a bit against the grain of what Image really stands for, and why it was formed, but I think for them, it was never about letting others own things, it was about looking out for number one - and Todd never pretended as though he was doing anything else.

That said, I love Eric Larsen and Jim Valentino - not so much for their work (neither have produced things that I’ve been super wild over), but because they are the reason Image remains the haven for creators to this day. Before Eric Stephenson took over as publisher, Eric Larsen and Jim Valentino held those roles and helped shepherd a lot of talented folks into comics. Valentino still does quite a lot of it over at his Shadowline imprint, where he kickstarted the careers of Kurtis J. Weibe and Nick Spencer. By all accounts, they’re also the two dudes stopping the tide of Todd and Marc, who would very much like to own what’s coming into the company (that said, I’ve been told that Valentino sure does take a small chunk of things published over at Shadowline - something like 10-15% of the property, but hey, that’s his right, I guess).

(And briefly, before I get to The Rob, there is, of course, Whilce Portacio, the often forgotten founding member of Image, who… well, just shows up and draws comics anymore. He’s forgotten, sadly, because circumstances removed him from the board fairly early in the process, and he’s probably the quietest personality out of the bunch.)

Then, there is The Rob. He’s a guy who loves comics so much, he lets it get in the way of… well, almost everything. He always lets his passion take over everything, including business sense. This is why he’ll put a guy like Joe Casey on Youngblood, and pull him off shortly after for a big, crazy direction change with The Rob back in charge, writing and drawing a Brand New Direction for… one issue. And then the book dies because… well, he had the creative juice, just not the business juice. The idea was ready, but the story wasn’t, nor were the fires stoked hot enough for the venture to work. He is pure creation and excitement unbridled, and it’s always the death of him… which is also why I love him the most. Keep on shining, you crazy diamond you. Keep on shining.

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That’s it for the one hundred and twenty-sixth instalment of Um, Actually. Check in every Monday and Thursday for a brand new column. If you have anything you’d like answered, hit up our contact page! If you submit anything via Twitter – to @blogaboutcomics, @Leask, or @soupytoasterson – remember to include the hashtag #UMACTUALLY so that we don’t lose it. Remember: you can ask us anything. Seriously, anything.