Welcome, dear readers, to our regular letter column; a series of missives from and to the internet, delivered by a series of tubes.

We welcome your comments and questions. About anything! It could be about comics, it could be about iCarly, it could even be about what to tell a classroom full of kids when they ask you who the best superhero is, or if you’re really a wizard. (Sidenote: this is a thing that happened to me this week.) We’ll answer ‘em. Probably.

Thank you, internet. (B)

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Scott (@scottowilliams) sells out: What’s the best logo? What’s the best corporate mascot? What’s the best national flag?

James: In order:

-The Nike Swoosh (simple, evocative, iconic);

-Mr. Met (THE METS ARE A CORPORATION, OKAY?!);

-Canada, obviously. RED AND WHITE, SON.

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Scott tosses a softball: Moby or Fatboy Slim?

James: I feel like Moby’s a dude that did a great job hustling to get Play all those paid placement deals, and it definitely helped his career as well as predicting a lot of the music environment now (like when Wilco licensed three of their songs to Volkswagon). And he made a bunch of good songs! Maybe he still is, I dunno! The drop from Play to 18 felt pretty stark to me, and his appearance on Conan last week didn’t really impress me. I like him, and “Bodyrock” is still incredible, but I’m just not feeling it all the way I was in 1999, you know?

The funny part of this is that I cannot remember a single thing Fatboy Slim has done since 2001 (“Weapon of Choice,” but I am willing to afford him so much more goodwill because that song, “Praise You” and “Right Here, Right Now” were so genuinely incredible. I have literally no idea what his two albums since have been like, so those great songs aren’t compromised by my expectations the way “South Side” was by “We Are All Made of Stars” or his listless strumming in front of Conan O’Brien. In my mind, Fatboy Slim is wonderful and perfect and that’s the way I like it.

Brandon: Scott, you can’t play me. I know that Moby and Fatboy Slim are in fact, the same person. I know this because I refuse to believe otherwise.

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Scott gets existential: Paul Giamatti?

James: As long as it’s not Lady in the Water, sure.

Brandon: That man sure does make some movies. And you know something? Good on him for looking as though he genuinely enjoys every acting experience he’s come across. I know he seems to look and act like a real put upon guy, but you can tell that no matter what he’s doing, he’s having a pretty wonderful time. That said, have you watched Big Fat Lair, Scott? Because I feel like you need to. I might actually write about that movie for no reason for this site one day.

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Scott is maybe undercover for a marketing firm: What does brand loyalty mean to you? What is a time when you have been exceptionally brand loyal?

James: For me, there are two main definitions, one of them good, one of them bad. The good one is just liking a brand enough that they’re your first choice when you’re looking to buy something in an area they operate. It’s pretty basic: you like the brand, you usually buy the brand, but you’re not married to it. This is good.

The second is where things go off the rails. It’s one thing to like a brand, but what gets crazy is when people adopt that loyalty as a part of themselves. I’m sure we’re all familiar with that, especially in tech circles. Apple vs. PC vs. that dumb penguin or whatever. iPhone vs. Android. Sega vs. Nintendo. Sony vs. Microsoft. Star Wars vs. Star Trek. It’s all genuinely insane because, and let me be clear: a corporation will never love you back. They don’t need you to fight for them. They will be just fine. They are not a person. That’s the poisonous brand loyalty, the adoption of a logo as identity (it blows my mind people get the Nike Swoosh or Apple logo tattooed on themselves), the point where you start overlooking flaws because dammit they’re your team, they’re your friend, and you will protect them from the bad people. This is silly.

I’ve probably had a lot of brand loyalties, from the first definition. I’ll buy almost any Nintendo system. I like Apple products. That’s not even taking into account sports fandom. But I hope that I’m not an unthinking yes-man about it. It’s just a company. Here’s hoping I remember that.

Brandon: Oh brand loyalty. Speaking as someone who deals with that (in a way) with the pretty cut-throat comics environment here in Edmonton, I think brand loyalty is horseshit. A person should be looking for quality and worth first and foremost, when in the role of a consumer. If you’re not getting quality service or a quality product, or that product or service doesn’t hit a nice sweet spot of “worth” (ie, time and money spent), then you really, really shouldn’t be supporting that product or service. It astounds me, how many people I see on a regular basis in my shop, floating over from other stores because of their terrible service, who refuse to come to our store first, even though some of the other stores are treating them like shit. Between stories of gross file neglect and price gouging, you would think they would stop shopping at that other place? And yet.

Anyway, that’s a rage answer, so take that how you will.

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Scott digs deep: Who is the best brother of Bill Murray: Joel Murray or Brian Doyle-Murray?

James: I have to give it to Joel Murray, if only because he had a major role in Monsters University this year and was absolutely delightful as Don Carlton, the middle-aged member of Oozma Kappa. Brian Doyle-Murray is maybe the most multifaceted non-Bill member of the Murray Brothers (you left off John Murray, I assume deliberately, because who cares about that guy), as a writer and regularly working voice actor, but, well, I just don’t really remember him that much in anything. But I remember Don, man.

I remember.

Brandon:

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That’s it for the one hundred and sixth installment of Um, Actually. Check in every Monday and Thursday for a new batch of questions. If you have anything you’d like answered, hit up our contact page! If you submit anything via Twitter – to @blogaboutcomics, @Leask or @soupytoasterson – remember to include the hashtag #UMACTUALLY so that we don’t lose it. Remeber: you can ask us anything. Seriously, anything.